I'm excited, proud, and honored to feature LaChan Hannon's guest "blog" for me today. PLEASE read and enjoy!
____________________________________________________________________ We can often find ourselves walking a fine line between being an individual and also wanting to belong; between liking ourselves just the way we are and desiring to fit in; between establishing our own ‘house rules’ and following the rules those expect of us. We, hopefully, raise our children to be independent, yet we measure them by the comparative standards of others. We want them to stand out and be noticed, but we frown upon their seemingly attention-seeking behavior. ‘Be good, but not too good or people will think you’re a show off. Be strong, but not too strong or people will think you don’t need help. Be cautious, but not too cautious or people will think you’re afraid to take risks’. We are walking, living, breathing contradictions. And, it makes us beautiful – it makes us all the same, normal. There were moments, days, months, and years that I did not feel so normal. Our invisible differences made me the target of mothers’ stares as my child flipped over his own stroller while still strapped in it as we waited for my daughter to finish dance class. It made me the recipient of unsolicited advice and ridiculous wisdoms of well-intentioned onlookers. But, it more importantly made me prayerful about my thoughts, deliberate about my words, and intentional about my actions. It made me reshape my definition of motherhood and accept that no matter how hard I tried to be normal just like everyone else, we were peculiar…and I make no apologies for that, now. The ‘day of no apologies’ began on Autism Day at Sesame Place, when I looked around and witnessed 6 full blown meltdowns (one of which was mine) happening simultaneously and met the eyes of each mother giving each an understanding smile, a shrug of the shoulders, a ‘thumbs up’, an encouraging head nod, or my arms as help. The ‘day of no apologies’ has become a lifestyle. It is a lifestyle that continues each day I reconcile my insecurities with my purpose. The ‘day of no apologies’ continues each time my differences are identified as something for which I should be ashamed or embarrassed. Being different is rarely easy. It isn’t always appreciated, understood, supported, and trusted. Mothering a child with autism AND a child without autism IS different. It is different than the generations of motherhood that came before me and demands that I revamp, recreate, and sometimes ignore the oral traditions of motherly wisdom passed down to me. My differences make me dependent on every other part of my being – my senses, my gut, my intuition, my husband, my faith, my revelation. I’ve learned that with the acceptance of difference comes confidence – confidence in knowing you are doing what you were put here to do. Differences facilitate finding your Purpose. I love the fact that my family is different. It is routine yet spontaneous (again with the contradictions). Life knew what I needed, and what I was lacking. Life created my normal just for me, and no one else. It is for me to appreciate, grow from, accept, and share my story so that someone else can accept their own normal. We’re different for a reason not so that we can all be the same and normal. We are different so that we can find our own purposes in life. And, so that we make an impact on someone else who needs to be confident in their difference as well. The ‘day of no apologies’ is a MOVEMENT of PURPOSE. We overcome by the power of our testimony. And, my story is different than yours. There is purpose in your difference. Live it and Share it…
3 Comments
2/10/2013 06:26:34 am
Mrs. Hannon,
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Beverly J. Hutton
2/10/2013 03:03:27 pm
I love your normal and am amazed at what "Life"is teaching all of us about "normal". I love you..... Daughter .....
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AuthorI'm Mike. If you have an interest in mental health, family functioning, and disability advocacy, this blog may be of interest to you. Archives
January 2016
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